police

The Allan Labor government has come up with a brilliant cost-saving idea by using melted down machetes to create the long-anticipated statue of Daniel Andrews.

Andrews has become only the sixth Premier to hold office for 3,000 days, making him eligible to have a statue made in his likeness as a commemoration of his legacy. The other five premiers to reach the milestone are Henry Bolte, John Cain Jr, Albert Dunstan, Rupert Hamer, and James McCulloch, although McCulloch never got a statue.

Quick calculations based on Andrews’ height and chest circumfrence deemed that 45 “Machete Amnesty Safe Disposal Bins” would be required for the statue, places outside police stations across the state.

“We’re going tremedously,” said a spokesperson for the program.

“Since the start of September, we’ve had 1386 machetes and dangerous knives surrendered. We think that is enough to cast a statue up to a little over Mr Andrews’ knees, so we need quite a bit more help”.

As part of the public awareness campaign, information has been rolled out in 16 languages to run across newspapers, radio, social media, digital displays and online video/streaming platforms.

The machete amnesty runs up until the end of November, by which time it is hoped to fully cast Dan Andrews’ likeness for placement outside 1 Treasury Place.